I meant to do this on Monday, but on Monday I also had a very important scan, and then had a very unusual reaction to said scan. I’m still recovering! But I will write about the scan, and what the results mean for us later on. So back to what happened in diet land last week for me.
Well… despite saying I was happy with losing the 400 grams, I wasn’t really that happy. In my head I’d really wanted to lose a little closer to the one kilo mark so did make a few adjustments before going into week 2. I’m pretty sure they were healthy ones. I consulted with the Google Doc (apparently not a very reliable physician). There were varying ideas around food consumption, and I'd started off going for the high-middle end of it, so I decided to drop my max consumption down by 500kj – that’s just 7% less than what it was for last week. Taking that down must have made a difference, because in week two I lost 700 grams, which was pretty much bang on what I’d been hoping to lose in a week.
This week I planned in a lot more stay-at-home time, which made meal planning a heck of a lot easier. Also, Murray cooked one of the meals on a night where I didn’t get home until 7ish, and that was great. All I had to tell him was how much oil he could use as a maximum, and he made a tasty, nutritious stir-fry for me that was well within the amount I was allowed to eat. I found that even just having one week of habit forming things, like eating a proper breakfast, made doing that seem more natural, and less like being on a diet.
I learnt a couple of great things this week. As I’m still nervous about how many kilojoules are in foods I do tend to under-eat when choosing foods to eat when out. This week I was out, and hungry, so opted for sushi. But I knew that rice packs a reasonable kilojoule punch, so ordered the lowest KJ kind (vege without avocado) and had five of them, instead of seven or eight. I couldn’t check properly what was in it until I got home, and then realised it was a lot less than what I thought! So this week I’m going to do some more research around the take-out food I would commonly eat so I don’t worry and under-eat during the day.
I also learnt that I have some resolve and am good at compromising with myself. On Sunday night I did stock take at the shop, and was there from around 3 until 8pm. And I forgot to bring my dinner. Normally, this would cause me to snack, and then, buy some hot chips on the way home. On the way home I ummmed and ahhhed about buying takeaways because I was so hungry, and came to a compromise. I bought a small packet of potato chips with the kilojoules written on it (so I could count them and keep track) and then made a quick, healthy dinner when I got home. I was fed by 9pm and happy. And instead of snacking at work I had one sugarless lollypop, and just made it last!
The night I had my ‘free’ meal I was at a friend’s place for dinner and I’m really glad I made that my free meal. I ate super healthily during the day in an attempt to make up for it. The food was amazing! But there was so much of it, and it was so rich that after eating I was quite ill. I hate being a difficult dinner guest, so hadn’t mentioned about how high lactose foods make me ill (on top of gluten free vegetarian – what host wants to hear that?). I LOVE high lactose foods, and I got to have a lot of them with this dinner. I wish my body could love the foods that my brain and mouth love so much! This was a good lesson in letting hosts know everything, or (better yet), offering to do the hosting myself. But the cheese was honestly amazing…
Despite temptation and eating some very naughty things (also had RAH trust meeting dinner to attend on Saturday) I lost some weight! And it mightn’t seem a lot, but just losing what I have has pushed my BMI back down into the top of healthy range. Which I know is just a silly number, but it makes me feel as though I am achieving something through making little changes. I am making little changes in my life to make me a healthier, happier person.
I just want to ensure I’ve pointed out that I’m not anti-fat and I don’t care what size my friends are or judge people based on their BMI. I just want to fit my jeans again. I have been more overweight than this before, and for me it meant my cholesterol went up, and because I didn’t fit my clothes, I didn’t want to go out. Because I didn’t go out, I stayed home and ate junk food and was crap to my boyfriend. This made me a sad person. I like to be a curvy girl, but I like being a certain size (not meaning a measurable size) because that size is what’s always been comfy for me. I’ve been a size 8 person before, and that person was about as happy with herself when she was the size 12 – 14 person. It’s about fitting the clothes I have that make me feel confident when I wear them and feeling good in myself. And being a tight arse, and not wanting to have to buy new jeans for Winter.
So that’s it. I won’t be surprised if I lose a bit more weight next week based only on the fact that I haven’t really had a diet to regulate so far due to illness.
Monday 19th March current weight: 61.5 kilos
Ultimate goal weight: 56.0 kilos
Weight to go: 5.5 kilos
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